Instead, I decided to bring you alternative lyrics to the 35-year-old hit song Merry Xmas Everybody, by English glam rock group Slade. It's been re-released so many times it could certainly need a bit of lyrical revamping.
If you know the melody (which I presume you do), please feel free to entertain your colleagues at the office Christmas party. They might even spot a bit of present-day market allusions.
But no, requests notwithstanding, there will be no Youtube video. The original, however, can be found here (do note the original style of clothing):
From all of us to all of you:
a very
Merry
Christmas!
***
Paretos optimale special edition:
Merry Xmas Everybody
Are you hanging on to stocks that start to fall?
Is it time for all the shorts to have a ball?
Are your holdings in the red, dear?
Have your earnings gone astray?
Do you fear that nothing keeps the bear away?
So here it is, Merry Xmas
Everybody's having fun
Look to the future now
It's only just begun
Are you waiting for the rate cuts to arrive?
Are you sure your holdings really have to dive?
Does your broker always tell you
That the next one is the best?
That it's up and rock and rollin' with the rest?
So here it is, Merry Xmas
Everybody's having fun
Look to the future now
It's only just begun
What will your clients do
When they see their holdings missing out again?
Ah-ha
Are you hanging on to stocks that start to fall?
Keep in mind, please, that it happens to us all
If you ride on down the hillside
Rest assured that in the end
You will see the bumpy market is your friend
So here it is, Merry Xmas
Everybody's having fun
Look to the future now
It's only just begun
So here it is, Merry Xmas
Everybody's buying funds (it's Xmas!)
Look to the future now
It's only just begun
